Her request was denied and she was ordered to pay her ex's legal costs.
When searching for the court paperwork concerning Nomi Abadi's lawsuit against Danny Elfman, we stumbled upon other cases that each of them were involved in.
One that stood out was a request for a "Domestic Violence Restraining Order" that Nomi filed against her ex boyfriend in December of 2020. We obtained the relevant court documents and read through them.
Her initial request, with her attached evidence, can be viewed HERE.
Her ex boyfriend's response, with his attached evidence, can be viewed HERE.
The name, emails and other identifying information of her ex boyfriend are redacted with blue bars. Nomi's email addresses and other identifying information are redacted with red bars. There are two email addresses used by each of them, labeled 1 and 2.
The name of a different ex girlfriend of the accused ex boyfriend is redacted in pink.
The name of ex boyfriend's mother is redacted in yellow (only appears in his response).
We will not go into great detail on these two documents, and we hope you will review them yourself.
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Our quick recap and opinions of those two documents:
In her request, Nomi provides scant evidence of her claims. In his response, her ex boyfriend refutes every one of her claims, with extensive evidence.
He also states, "She is also very identified with the #metoo movement and it became clear that she was now interested in weaponizing the #metoo climate to vindictively harm me." And, "It is unfortunate to say, but I am convinced more so than ever, given the filing of this frivolous restraining order petition, that Mrs. Abadi is capable of malicious, vindictive and illegal action in the interest to harm people she dislikes."
But of course her ex boyfriend, who she has accused of Domestic Violence, would say that whether he is innocent or not.
However, the way that she communicates with him in text and emails does seem to support his perspective, in our opinion. Please read over the documents and decide for yourself. At a later date, we may go into greater detail with commentary, but no promises.
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After those two documents, the case goes on:
Her ex boyfriend's response was filed February 8, 2021.
On February 10, 2021, both parties are present for a hearing.
Part of the Minute order reads:
"The Court finds the party requesting the order of protection did not sustain the applicable burden of proof and accordingly the request is denied. Any temporary restraining order earlier issued is hereby dissolved. The case is ordered dismissed."
On 3/10/21 the ex boyfriend motions for his attorney's fees and costs to be covered by Nomi Abadi. Part of this motion reads, "At the hearing, Petitioner testified and presented evidence of the alleged harassment and abuse. The Petitioner made numerous false assertions in both her declaration attached to her DV 100 and during the Restraining Order Hearing itself on February 10, 202. Respondent has outlined, in his DV120 response, all of the false allegations and attached exhibits to prove that Petitioner falsely testified in her declaration and during the court hearing. The Court found in favor of the Respondent and dismissed the temporary remaining order against Respondent. As the prevailing party in his action, Respondent seeks to recover his reasonable fees and court costs in the amount of $8,085.00 pursuant to Family Code section 6344."
On 4/22/21 Nomi filed an opposition to this motion. Most of her argument was based her interpretation of what the law says about when/whether the court can order that the prevailing party's legal fees be paid. She argues that the law states it should take into consideration whether the other party can afford it, offering evidence that she cannot afford it, and that he has plenty of money and doesn't need any from her. She also points out that he didn't check a particular box or provide the correct attachments. She adds, "Finally, Nomi's request for domestic violence restraining order was not frivolous, trivial, or brought in bad faith."
On 4/26/2021, Nomi is present for the motion hearing, as are her lawyer and the ex boyfriend's lawyer.
Part of the Minute Order reads, "The court rules that petitioner shall pay respondent $3,000.00 in attorney's fees and $0.00 for court costs."
On 5/27/2021 Nomi files an appeal.
On 8/31/2021, her appeal is dismissed: "It appearing that the appellant is in default pursuant to Rule 8.100(c), California Rules of Court, the appeal filed May 27, 2021, is dismissed. In addition the Court notes that appellant has also failed to file a Case Information Statement. (2DCA/APP-004)"
The final document in this case is dated 10/14/2021 and is a confirmation that her appeal had been dismissed.
------------ On November 14, 2021, Nomi made a post that included, "I was a victim of grand theft."
We cannot be sure, but we have to wonder if she is referring to the payment she was ordered to make.
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When she appeared on the Behind the Chameleon podcast in January of 2022, Nomi spoke about this case. The host mentioned not being able to publicly talk about abusers without evidence, lest you get sued for defamation.
Nomi responded, "I've been there, too, by the way. I've been sued and my abuser won for putting a restraining order against him."
And, "[The system] was built for white men to help white men, and then you know maybe white women if they're lucky. Or if you're in a room like I was, with the whole bench of old white men, who hated me the minute I walked in the door. I was fucked in my hearing. Like, I knew there was no way I was going to walk out and win. I was like, I'm going to get fucking creamed. You know, despite the fact that that guy was much much, worth 30 times more than I. And um, yeah, so anyway, yeah its hard out there it sucks, but yeah you're right we will get sued for defamation sometimes and that, that's a huge risk you know no one wants to take.
Legally speaking, Nomi was not sued by her ex boyfriend, and "defamation" was not at all a part of that case. Yet she leads the host and listeners to believe that is what happened. The reality is she initiated legal action that cost him over $8k, and she did not provide sufficient evidence, so she lost. The court ordered her to pay just part of his costs ($3k). The fact that her ex boyfriend is "worth" so much more than she is is irrelevant. The fact that she brings it up here, as if it should have any bearing on the outcome of the case, is interesting. She seems to see his request to cover his legal fees as a separate, unrelated attack on her, not a consequence of an action she initiated. She seems to believe that the fact that he is "worth" more should have swayed the court in her favor, if only they weren't all white men who, "hated me from the minute I walked in the door".
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What conclusions can we draw from this case? Does the fact that Nomi was unable to prove her case mean that she was not a victim of domestic abuse by this ex boyfriend?
If her ex boyfriend appears to have provided evidence that Nomi has lied or stretched the truth, does that make it true? Or could he just be a very good liar?
If we WERE to conclude that Nomi made false allegations against one man, does that mean that it's impossible for her to have really been abused by a different man?
We acknowledge that sometimes the American Justice System is flawed, and victims do not see justice. The system is indeed stacked in favor of white, affluent men.
We also acknowledge that if someone lies in one situation, it does not automatically mean that everything they say is a lie. It is entirely possible that Nomi Abadi was a victim of both these men, or of only one but not the other.
We also acknowledge our bias in favor of Danny Elfman, and therefore a bias against his accuser. We have done our best to go into this with open hearts and minds, but we must admit that we have come out of this not feeling confident in Ms. Abadi's version of truth or reality.
We hope you will read the documents and make up your own mind.
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